Well here I am - in my 4th month of fertility treatment. I must admit that I haven't been blogging much because this last round of Clomid really kicked me into depression mode. Now that I've been off of it for 2 weeks, I can clearly say, it was the Clomid - and I hope I don't have to take it again.
So far, I have had about 17 ultrasounds (follicular), a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG), a Post-Coital Test (kind of embarassing), and tons of bloodwork (that I must have as many holes in my right arm as a sponge) and no clear-cut answer as to the cause of our infertility. Is it possible that Mark and I really just suffer from crappy timing - for 2 years?
This past month I had an IUI - an Intrauterine Insemination. I won't know if I am pregnant til next week and so far it doesn't seem like it. I've been pregnant 2 times before and all the symptoms I had are not here. I know I still could be - so I am being a good girl and not eating tuna, consuming caffeine or alcohol, or doing aerobic activity - no bike rides with my boys.
The nurses have mentioned that injectables are far more successful than Clomid (tablets) and I need to ask them about those meds. I have made a list of things I need to do in case I have to take hormonal medication again and end up being depressed:
1. Keep busy - continually clean the house and go through our things for donations
2. Play lots of music - keeps me calm and makes me happy
3. Read books
4. Stop eating french fries and fried food (I did this last time and gained lots of pounds) Weight gain makes you even more depressed - to be depressed AND fat sucks
5. Spend even more time watching movies with my husband and son
6. Talk to my friends and family
If my pregnancy test next week comes out negative, I am not sure what we will do next. I guess I will just hope (as I have many, many, times) that I AM pregnant and deal with what to do later.
1 comment:
Thanks for the comments on my blog. It is lovely to meet another SI (secondary infertile!). Sometimes it feels like we are a rare breed. I know what you mean about crappy timing. I sometimes wonder that too about TTC last year when I was ovulating...Also, I did the same as you when I sank into a really bad depression towards the end of last year/the beginning of this year - wrote lists on how to keep myself focused on life - a daily list, a three monthly list & a yearly list. I still have these lists on a cork-board in our bedroom & have just about done everything on my three monthly list (joined a gym, got a w'end job). I like your blogs! Looking forward to reading more.
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