If You Are Crazy and You Know It HIT MY CAR!

The party was great. Twenty-two first grade boys - are we crazy? Yes we are. Everything went well. Some parents stayed and it was nice because the bowling alley is a public place, afterall - we were responsible for all these kids. I asked my cousin and her friend to help me watch them so they sat there and just watched the boys and told me if anyone was wandering off. Then after 2 hours we moved to the lounge where the breakdancers performed. They were very good. We ate cupcakes and I ordered pizza and drinks for the dancers. Then the breakdancers taught all our little guests how to dance. I told Ricky I expect to see some moves at home!

So it's official: I am not driving the first Thursday of every month if I can help it. Last month, on the first Thursday, that crazy woman hit me. Yesterday, I was ONE BLOCK away from my house with Ricky's BFF in the backseat on our way to pick up Ricky and I moved to the side to allow two cars to pass who were coming from the opposite direction. The man wanted me to go, so I went, and I had no idea that the black car behind me decided to just GO. So she crashed into me. We pulled to the side and she was older than me and crying and clutching her arm. She said she thought she was having a heart attack and was on her way to the hospital!!! I offered to call her an ambulance or to drive her to the hospital myself (even though I really didn't want to and would be super inconvenienced - but I can't let someone just die in the street!). So we exchanged information and went on our way.

My car now has a minor scratch about 4 feet long. Uggghhhhhh........we're not going to bother to fix it. It's not even that noticeable. I am surprised I didn't have more damage - it seemed like she really smashed into me. LUCKY in a very un-lucky situation.

The first incident a month ago happened about 5 blocks away from my house. This one was 1 block away. I have concluded that the women in my neighborhood should not be driving (crazy & thinking she is having a heart attack) and have poor judgement.

Anyway, at least we are all okay. I am excited about this weekend - seeing my cousin's play with my sister and BIL and taking the boys to the train show.

And now I have even more DVDs I have to watch and no clue when I will watch them:

Tree of Life
Contagion
Midnight in Paris
Anonymous
Friends With Benefits
Parenthood Season 2

Hopefully I'll be able to sit down with Mark tonight and watch one so we can return it to the library.

In other news, I've been asked to moderate a new book club aimed at hip-ish, young-ish people in their 20s, 30s, and 40s. I'm excited about this and can't wait to get it started. We'll be meeting in restaurants and bars. Should be fun.

Flying (with no broomstick)

Ricky's 7th birthday party is Saturday and we've been so busy getting ready for that. 23 first grade boys at the bowling alley - we will be wiped out for sure. Ricky loves to dance - a lot. He got it from Mark. I wish someone was getting married right now because Ricky sure can bustamove! So back in November he said, "Mom, if you and dad give me a birthday party, can I please have a breakdancer at the party?" So I started looking and found a group of 7 breakdancers to come and dance at the party before we have cake. They are very nice guys and will also teach the boys some dance moves - so they're not just bringing home a goody bag - they'll have some moves for mom and dad as well.

Then afterwards, we're having our family party back at our house. No idea what food to order for that and of course my mom asks me every 10 minutes if I've ordered the food yet. I should really bake more stuff for that - Ricky's favorite cookies and treats. Oh yeah, and clean the house.

I just have to find the energy to fill all those treat bags tonight. After work I'm going to get his birthday presents and I have no clue what to get. Maybe a Kinect game, some Star Wars stuff.

With Ricky's allergy, I am baking the cupcakes rather than ordering a cake he can't eat. Not sure when I'll have time to do that - will most likely be making in the middle of the night I am sure.

Ricky's gone to 2 birthday parties in the last week at different jumpy places and I've been meeting more of the parents of the boys in his class and they are very nice. Ricky also attended the birthday party of a set of twins from his old school. It was nice catching up with the parents I haven't seen in a while - the nice parents.

I just can't believe my baby will be 7! Time really flies.

On the domestic front, our water heater decided to die on Monday night. We were lucky that Mark happened to decide to take a trip down to the basement (at 2am) when he saw the water trickling on the floor. It just started. So we've been nomads all week - showering at my mom's every night - and washing our hands and faces with ICE COLD water. Plumber is installing the new water heater tomorrow. You really take all these things for granted.

Mark just finished our pantry. We bought all our stuff when Container Store had their sale earlier this month. It looks great and I spent many hours yesterday organizing it and I'm not done!

On the movie front, I watched Breaking Dawn part 1. I liked those books a lot. The movies, not so good. I still do not like Kristin Stewart as an actress. She always seems pained and constipated. She would have been a good Leather Tuscadero on Happy Days.

I also watched Snow Flower and the Secret Fan. I read the book last year. I watched it with Mark and we liked it. It was odd that they used the same actresses to play the past and present though.

I still have Tree of Life but haven't had time to watch it yet. Waaaaaayyyy over due! Hear it's good.

It will be a great weekend to be sure. Then I will collapse.

Where do you think you are

All has been quiet. No peep from the crazy woman. Hoping it stays that way. I was over due with having bad luck with a complete moron.

Teddy started preschool this past monday and we are so relieved that he likes it. There are 5 adults in a class of 20 kids. The class is blended, and there is one girl in a wheelchair and a few others like Teddy who have an IEP. The special ed teacher has been great. Today was tricky because my mom took Teddy to school and picked him up. So we'll see how he adjusts to the new routines. I will officially start potty training this weekend. That will be interesting. Hopefully he sees all the other kids going and that will inspire him. Because of his IEP there is a teacher's aid that changes his diapers. He is the youngest in class and all the kids have been so nice to him.

One mother approached me about running for office on their school board. I am very friendly at pick-up and drop-off. After what happened with the other moms at the previous school I would rather lay low. I feel bad because when Ricky was in preschool I was always very active - always the Room Mother, always baking, always the chaperone on every single field trip. Of course I would run for office, that's in my personality, but because of stupid people, I find that it's not worth the trouble. Let someone else do it.

Collecting rsvp's for Ricky's 7th birthday party. We're having it at a bowling alley and Ricky had asked us to hire breakdancers back at Thanksgiving so I started looking and found a group of 7 guys to do it. We invited his friends from his old school and all the boys in his current class in his new school. We didn't invite our friends' kids and I feel bad about this but it would be too many kids. Need to look for a cake and fill all the goody bags.

On the friend front, Mark and I have really not socialized all that much. It's been so busy with the kids that we don't see our friends as often as we used to. I have a friend from library school who I have grown apart from - not purposely. She lives about an hour away and is also busy with her 3 kids. I have tried to email her to get together and she doesn't respond (been a few times this has happened in the last few years) yet she still sends us Christmas cards. I can't understand where she wants to be in my life. If you send me a Christmas card, then you still want to be in contact. If you blow off my emails to get together, then you aren't interested in being friends. Which is it. Decide. Unless you just want me to be on your Christmas card list with no contact whatsoever. Kind of a waste and kind of stupid. I get the busy thing - but please email me. If not today or tomorrow, maybe in a few months? Just email me. Sometime.

My cousin was messing around with my facebook account last year and accidentally press "hide" on this friend's feed and her husband's - and a few others. I never undid the hide (no reason) so I don't see their feeds unless I go to their pages. So consequently I never "like" or comment on their facebook stuff and I wonder if this sends the wrong message. If something happens with them (birthdays), Mark tells me because they are on his feeds. It's kind of sad. I really liked her. She made me laugh a lot in library school.

We have a group of friends we probably see 6 times a year. The rest of our friends we probably see once a year if we are lucky. But we are busy and so are they. No hard feelings. We are probably the least social people lately because of the kids and the recent move. We used to have Halloween parties every year. We haven't had one in a few years - our friends have taken over. A few friends thought that *we* hosted the party and didn't invite them because they saw the photos on facebook. Darn facebook!

Anyways, busy weekend. Ricky has cello and orchestra. He's doing very well. Then he competes in his very first karate tournament on Sunday. He is a little nervous but he'll do well.

Watch Out for a Crazy Person Near You

I have constant reminders of the beauty of life in the faces of my husband and sons and family and friends. However, every once in a great while, I am faced with the UGLINESS of human beings. Unfortunately, it just happened to me a few days ago.

I was driving in my car, with Ricky in the back seat and we had just come from Target where I bought Teddy all his school supplies. I was driving in the right lane and there was a big black Suburban on the my left. The woman swerved and didn't notice me. I looked at her and she was on the phone and distracted. She was older - in her 70s. I honked at her - not to be a jerk but to say "here I am. Watch out. Please don't hit me." She got pissed off. The lanes were merging and I got ahead of her and started to merge in front of her in the left lane. She decided that she hated my gutts and sped up alongside me (into ONCOMING TRAFFIC) and crashed her car into my side mirror. I was aghast and stepped on the gas to get in front of her. I drove a few streets and turned down a side street - and she followed me - blaring her horn all the way. Ricky was like "what the heck mom!"

I am a great driver. Not one ticket since 1992! That's 20 years ago! So anyways, she parked alongside me and started yelling every swear word in the book at me. I stayed calm the entire time and told her to please stop with the bad language - my son is in the back seat. So the cop came. I was lucky - the police officer was a woman - maybe older than me. She saw right through this lady for the psycho she really is. The woman who hit me told us that she just came from her neurologist and was on many prescription drugs!! The officer asked for our licenses and insurance and the woman didn't have insurance. Then she told the officer that her husband was a cop. Turns out he is retired. Lucky for me, the cop was on my side. She was annoyed with this woman and gave her a ticket for no insurance. She listened to both our stories and believed my side (thank god). She even had the cop talk to her husband on the phone - TWICE. The cop was so angry and was yelling at the both of them.

The cop liked me a lot. I was calm, respectful, and even though I wanted to yell back at that crazy woman I was silent. Ricky was cold and had to pee. I wanted it all to go away and go home. I wanted to sit on my couch and watch the news.

My mirror folded and went forward when she hit me and it dragged a 15 inch line of paint on her car. Our damage is so minor that we aren't getting it fixed. I called our insurance company and told them everything and told them not to give that lady a dime. So far it's been quiet and nobody has filed a claim under my name. Maybe the fact that she had no proof of insurance gave her more to deal with.

Anyways, she is crazy. Literally. So of course I am freaking out that she is going to leave stink bombs at my front door. The crash report has our addresses. The cop let me leave and we didn't exchange phone numbers - the cop said "You don't want this crazy B**** to call you. You are free to go home." The crazy woman kept threatening me and telling me I was going to pay, that she was going to get me, etc.

I wish that besides a don't drink and drive law that there was one against driving while taking prescription meds because you are a lunatic and shouldn't be on the road where you are succeptible to road rage against mothers with young children who just want to get home and make dinner.

So thanks to the internet it's easy to find out where I work. So I warned my work associates to please not tell anyone when I work next in case someone comes in asking for me. I am praying she doesn't come in looking for a book or something and I have to HELP her!! UGH. I would rather steer her in the direction of the Self Help/you-are-crazy books.

Anyways, Teddy has his first day of preschool tomorrow. I am a total wreck. His Thomas the train back pack is ready, his school supplies and paperwork are ready. I just hope he'll be okay. I hope he doesn't cry and the 5 adults in the classroom catch any shenanigans before anything happens. Because if something happened, he can't tell me. Please let this be the right thing for him.

Now Eat This!

In between keeping my children alive and making sure our house doesn't look like an episode of Hoarders, I've been sneaking in a page or two of a book, or watching 10 minutes of a show while I fold a basket of laundry. It certainly helps I've been working much more now so I can grab whatever I want at the library.

Now Reading:

How to Be an American Housewife by Margaret Dilloway

Now Perusing:

Sink Reflections by Marla Cilley - The Flylady

DVDs Watched this weekend:

Super 8 - Really enjoyed but thought the ending was too abrupt.

Parenthood - Season 1 - Didn't watch the whole season while it was on, so thought I would catch up on the ones that got away.

The final Harry Potter movie - Yes, we are *that* far behind. We tried to watch it last night and I fell asleep. Mark stayed up and watched the entire thing and said it was great. So much for watching movies together!

Random Mommy Banter About Stuff

Since Teddy finished Early Intervention and we had our IEP meeting, we've been in waiting mode for his placement letter. It's been a few weeks so I made a few phone calls and the letter is coming and they will need to "call me to discuss." I take that to mean that maybe since it's already almost February and the middle of the school year that there may not be openings in schools that are closest to our house. They told us he qualifies for bus service and let me tell you there is no way in hell I am putting my 3 year old who doesn't speak much on a bus by himself!!!

Since I am not running Teddy to therapy and therapy playgroup appointments, I've been spending more time with him at home while I organize our new place. I like not running around because the quality of time I spend with him is so much better. While I think the Early Intervention helped him in many ways, I was disappointed in the speech therapy. I think she could have come more than once a week but didn't want to. I loved her - she was a sweet person but it was hard to see much progress when he only gets it once a week. But it was free and nothing is perfect I guess.

I guess there would be nothing wrong with keeping him home and sending him to preschool in the fall. The therapists strongly urged us to get him in preschool right away for socialization, etc. I want him to go to Ricky's school for preschool and I think it's best to have continuity so after I see where the placement is, I'll call the preschool teacher at Ricky's school to see what she thinks of Teddy and if he would be okay to start in September given his speech.

I love Ricky's school. Transferring him was the best decision. The school just won the President's Blue Ribbon Award for Excellence in the fall. Ricky is enjoying it and the kids are nicer than the other school (so he says) so that's great. They just had a standardized test earlier this month and Ricky scored in the 3rd-4th grade level for math (OMG) but he scored average for Reading and Phonics. The "problem" is that the average for the first grade kids at his school is well above the national average (40+ points above the national average!!) so even though Ricky scored 'average" it's below the average of the other first grade kids at his school. I guess they started teaching reading in kindergarten at his new school. Meanwhile, Ricky had a joke for a teacher who didn't teach and just treated the class like it was summer camp at his old school. So that means I'll be spending a lot more time on reading and phonics with him - which I love doing - so he can be "above average."

So let me brag about my eldest little boy for a moment. He is amazing at the cello - his teacher keeps telling me he plays better than the 4th graders he teaches. He is also doing very well in karate - he is now a Red belt with one stripe from his last belt exam. He loves it and just learned a new kata. He wants to compete in the next tournament in a few weeks. I will be more nervous than he will be! I am so proud of him and hope he continues to be so driven.

Potty training update - I read Teddy the potty books and talked to him about it and he doesn't seem to be interested. I asked Ricky to show Teddy when he pees and Ricky just says "No way Mom!!' Well can't say I blame him. Not sure I'd like someone to watch me every time I peed, but just thought it would be such a great inspiration for Teddy.... ok next on the list - dvds I guess...

On the home front, both my mom and my MIL will be having surgery next month. They will both need help so there will be lots of shuffling around.

Tonight we'll be seeing "Super 8" after the kids go to bed. I'm going to bake an apple pie and eat it with vanilla ice cream while it's still hot from the oven. Oh yeah, and we have tons of alcohol left over from the parties so it will be nice to have a lot of choices this evening!

Hopeful and Sneaky

Happy new year and all that stuff. I am really happy to see 2011 go. It was a hard year for many reasons. The good news though is that we finally moved to our new house the weekend before Thanksgiving. It's a better house for us in so many ways and the kids are very happy there so we're excited about organizing and decorating our new home.

Christmastime was a bit stressful. The entire family got sick for 3 weeks - so much so that Ricky even missed the school Christmas pageant! He wasn't upset about it but it was too bad - you're only in 1st grade once. It would have been a good video to watch years in the future!

We celebrated Teddy's 3rd birthday the first week of January. I can't believe my baby boy is 3 already! His Early Intervention stuff ended and we had his IEP meeting last week. He qualified for a blended program in a preschool and now we're waiting to see what kind of a placement he receives. I hope the school is good, the kids are nice to him, and the school is nearby. We'll see. I am nervous every time I check the mailbox! In the meantime, I am going to start potty training him tomorrow - wish me luck!

Last weekend I pulled off 2 surprise parties for my husband's 40th. The first was a surprise dinner with our friends at an Italian restaurant. He thought he was just going to eat dinner with me (which is more than enough) but the hostess blew it when she said our name and "Party for 11" when we came in. I didn't warn her it was a surprise so I don't fault her. Mark was excited nonetheless.

Then after dinner, I had about 15 more friends waiting at our house to surprise him. He wanted to go out to a bar with our friends but I told him I had a cake and a party ball waiting for him at our house. So he agreed. He was shocked to walk in our house and see more friends. It was nice. It was tricky doing the guest list - I limited it to *his* friends - not mine. My sister and BIL did a great job being my secret helpers. I am a horrible liar and bad at sneaking around. I would never have an affair but if I did I would be busted in a heartbeat. I had to have all the party supplies and decorations ready and hidden for them. It was hard because Mark walks around every corner of the house. It was so incredibly busy the day of the party that when I picked up the balloons, I failed to notice that the $9.99 balloon that was a big 40 that I had ordered was actually a big 50!!! Our friends thought it was funny. I was kicking myself for not checking. Oh well.

My mom then surprised him a few days later with a surprise party with our family. She taught us all how to play mah jong and now I am hooked! Will need to look for a set at some point.

Anyways, I am very hopeful for a good year. Despite the forecast of the apocalypse, let it be a good one. I have decided to take my bucket list by the horns and try to do the things I want to do "some day." My husband agrees. Thank god we have good health insurance! Ice skates (and other things) here I come!!

Sort of Losing My Mind

Things are super busy and I thought I had a good handle on everything until I realized yesterday that I sent Ricky to school the previous week on picture day in his best outfit but forgot to send in the photo order!! Duh. And then I also realized that I forgot to send in Teddy's papers for his transition to the public school system for preschool - which he is supposed to start in January! Bad mommy.

Today I meet with Ricky's teacher for parent teacher conferences. This should be good - she is nice and Ricky is doing well in school. I am curious to see what she has to say. All is good from his reports, but I want to know what she says. He says he fits in and he listens. His papers are always 100%. I just hope he is happy in school - since it's new and everything.

Ricky attended his first birthday party from kids from his old school the other day. It was a zoo and there are a few kids in particular who are mean-spirited. A few things happened but in general I don't miss those boys (with the exception of about 5 who are Ricky's friends). The parents were nice and were curious about the school change and I told them how it all happened - with Zac's speech therapy and the learning about the awesome peanut/tree nut accommodations. I spoke to another peanut dad at the party and told him about Ricky's new school and the peanut stuff. I hope that school changes its ways or something bad will happen - again.

Busy Bee, Busy Me

I laugh at myself for claiming to be "back" only to not blog for the entire summer. Really, just one blog entry this whole year? How sad of me.

We had a great summer - everyone was healthy, no family members in the hospital, no accidents. We even managed to take a few days and took the boys to Wisconsin Dells. It made them very happy. They are both water people and love the pool so much so it was perfect. Mark started a new job in May and so far, so good.

Ricky started first grade and after the first week of school, Teddy's speech therapist told me that another nearby private school offered kids from K-8th grade speech therapy up to 3 times a week for its students. I called the principal and she confirmed this was true so I asked what their accommodations were for peanut/tree nut allergy kids and it was amazing what she told me. I'll have to write a post just about that topic because it is wonderful all by itself.

Based on the peanut/nut policy alone, we decided to transfer him immediately. Mark and I came in and met with the principal, toured the school, and pulled Ricky out that very day. He has now gone to the new school for 7 school days, has made a bunch of friends, and says he loves it. It's been pretty stressful, but I am relieved.

I am so blessed that my mom is retired and helps me with the boys. Besides school, Ricky has swimming lessons, karate lesson, cello lesson, and children's orchestra rehearsals every week. The cello was entirely his idea. It's great and I am thrilled he enjoys it. That just started the last few weeks. New school, new instrument. His teacher also heads the children's orchestra. 10 girls and 3 boys. Everyone plays violin except Ricky who is the only cello. He doesn't mind - he gets to sit. I personally love the cello with its low, soulful.

Teddy has speech therapy, developmental therapy, occupational therapy, Speech/OT playgroup, and Toddler Gymnastics every week. He is just a toddler but I already feel what some parents of older kids may have with 2 kids in sports and activities.

My boss has asked me to work 40 hours a month now (was 4 hours a month for the past year) so it's quite an adjustment. The job is nice and easy but it's the logistics of getting everything done with the kids and house and the running to and from that gets me frazzled. I feel like I'm becoming an old lady who obsesses over little things. I actually bought a momAgenda to keep me organized about where I need to be, where the kids need to be, and everything in between. I love it.

Teddy's speech is really getting better. He is using a lot more words and now we're working on putting 2 words together to make a sentence. It's so sad when I see a kid who is the same age asking his mom for this and that at the store while my Teddy uses one word here and there and grunts. He just had his annual meeting with all his therapists this past Tuesday and they recommended the Speech/OT playgroup which consists of 9 kids all the same age who have speech delays. He did a great job his first time this week. He will go to preschool in January already! He's not even potty trained yet but I guess that doesn't matter.

Anyways, it's a new start for Ricky at this new school. So glad he is liking it. Hoping for a great school year.

I'm Back!!!

I haven't blogged since last December when Ricky had the peanut butter scare. So many things have happened since and I just never got blogging back into my mommy routine. I also have not read any of my favorite bloggy friend blogs and I am hoping all the people I read about are fine. I plan on doing lots of catch-up.

It is now May and I can't believe I've been off blogger for that long. In a nutshell, here are the highlights of my life:

1. We had a good Christmas despite the roll of bad luck.

2. Ricky recovered from peanut butter attack. I spend hours at his school in meetings with the principal and assistant principal and I trained almost 20 lunch/recess parents on how to use an epi-pen.

3. Mark fractured his foot! He is still wearing the boot.

4. Mark got a new job!

5. My dad and stepmom visited for 2 weeks and stayed in my house. Nice to catch up with dear old dad!

6. Teddy had a medical diagnostic test by a world renown neurological pediatrician, and 5 therapists last week. After worrying that his speech delay is a sign of a brain problem or some form of autism, we are thrilled beyond belief that their conclusion is just an isolated speech delay and nothing more. Good news! Now Teddy is getting speech and development therapies weekly and now I am waiting for him to get approved to attend City Kids - which is a center where he can get occupational therapy for sensory stuff.

7. I'm a proud mama so bear with me while I brag about my kid a bit!

Ricky is really thriving in karate class. He is practicing his kata more than the arm pit farts now. He will have a belt test in 2 weeks - but I'm guessing he'll get stripes instead of a red belt. You have to be flawless to just skip the 5 stripes and get the belt - but we'll see.

Ricky also brought home a near perfect straight A report card. I couldn't be happier. Of course my family members rewarded him for each A and he was more than glad to fill his piggy bank. As a kid, my sister and I both got compensated for each A. Besides enjoying the achievement and doing it for yourself, it was nice to save up for that special thing.

8. Teddy turned 2 and Ricky turned 6!

Well those are the highlights since my last post. Looking forward to warmer weather and playing outside more. We're going to a play date this afternoon with about 5 other moms. Am I the only crazy person who will only invite 2 moms maximum- over? I think 5 moms with their kids is too many people - especially when they have little kids too. The 6 year old boys can take care of themselves though - so maybe it's not so bad.

I have bumped into Mandy (the mean mom) at birthday parties a few times and at the last one she was VERY VERY nice. I was nice back to her, of course, but after what happened, I just want to keep it cordial. No more play dates. No more inside information about my life. She started asking me personal information like we were friends again and I didn't want to share. I know that everything I tell her will be told to the 4 other moms in her circle (who I used to be friends with). She was the one who broke it off with me so why would I want to go back there? I am trying my best to take the high road and not tell anyone about what they did to me.

The new moms I am befriending keep asking me about the other moms and cliques and I just smile and say nothing. They have such a positive attitude toward the other moms and don't see the cliques and I don't want to ruin it for them. But I feel bad letting them find out by themselves and be victim to the B.S..... I don't know.

A Bully Almost Killed My Son

I kid you not, no sooner did I press "publish" on my last post about Ricky's nut allergy when the phone rang. It was the school secretary at Ricky's school telling me that Ricky took a bite of a classmate's peanut butter snack!!!!

Ricky's teacher followed the guidelines I left her and gave him a benadryl tablet immediately. They said his throat and mouth were burning and his stomach was bothering him. I woke up Teddy from his nap, and drove to school - of course hitting every red light, slow people, turned the wrong way, etc. They said he was breathing okay (so no need for the epipen at that point) and I told them to let him drink water to flush out the peanut butter.

When I arrived at the school office, there was Ricky sitting at a table. I put his coat on, and was telling everyone in the office that I was going to take him to the ER. My mom was meeting me at the school to grab Teddy. While mid-sentence, Ricky started vomiting - gallons - 4 times. His color changed and then I realized that my kid was REALLY IN TROUBLE. I thought I was watching him die.

In a nutshell, the secretary called 911 and they came. I rode in the ambulance with Ricky and asked him what happened. My son always asks if something has peanuts, nuts, or peanut butter in it before he eats it. He said that the Big Bully Boy - who sits at a different table in the class - walked up to him and said while holding out a peanut butter sandwich cracker, "Here Ricky, try this cracker. It has no peanuts or peanut butter in it." So my son took the cracker and took a bite.

Immediately, his throat and mouth were on fire and he started to feel like crap quickly. He told a classmate he had peanuts, and she told the teacher.

This Big Bully Boy is the same boy who had been bullying Ricky earlier this school year. Physically throwing him down at school and at sports, taunting, humiliation, etc. This kid almost killed my son.

The paramedic on the ambulance told me that his fire chief had a peanut allergy and he cooked a big barrel of stew for the firehouse and put 2 tablespoons of peanut oil in it - unaware of the chief's allergy. Well the chief took one bite and was in Intensive Care at the hospital for 4 days!!!

When we got to the hospital, there were many people in Ricky's room. The doctors all told me that since his teacher gave him a benadryl tablet immediately, it really saved his life. If minutes had gone by, his body would have followed the anaphylaxis route. That's how bad Ricky's allergy was.

Now I always knew that his allergy was bad, but I guess I thought it was moderate - probably denial. This was a HUGE wake up call. I'll have to write more later - there is so much to this story, and I was up from 1am to 5am this morning - I couldn't sleep with all my anger and frustration buzzing in my head. Mark and I met with the school principal yesterday and I'll write about that later. Just reviewing all this right now makes me want to lie down and sleep.

Let's Talk About Nuts

Ricky is allergic to peanuts and tree nuts and has an epipen. But besides eating it, he has symptoms just being near nuts. We suspected his allergy when he was a toddler - I gave him a peanut butter cracker and he said his mouth was burning and he cried after just one bite. Certain foods would really bother him after just taking one bite. So we had him tested, and sure enough, he is allergic to all nuts, dogs, cats, dust mites, dust mite poop, etc.

In preschool, I showed the teacher how to use the epipen and it was fine. She accidentally let Ricky eat a peanut butter cracker one day and didn't tell me. I picked him up and when I was buckling him into his carseat, his eyes were black and sunken in and he said his throat hurt and he couldn't breathe so well. He told me he took a bite of a peanut butter cracker. So I gave him water and went up to the teacher and asked her if that was true and she said yes, and sorry. So if I didn't go up to her she wasn't going to tell me - she was going to let Ricky have his reaction with me -with me not knowing. He could've gone into anaphylactic shock in the back seat with me not knowing why and maybe not realizing what was happening - so not knowing that he needed his epipen.

I liked this teacher too. She was fine otherwise, I just didn't like how she treated this situation - and it was obvious to me that she didn't fully understand Ricky's allergy.

Now I'm not a crazy mother. I may be a bit overprotective, but I have to be with Ricky's allergy.

Now in kindergarten they have full days - so there is lunch time. I spoke with the assistant principal and made arrangements for Ricky to have a designated seat and to tell the teacher to check the kids sitting near him - that they be moved if they have peanut butter. There are 3 kindergarten classes and one kid in each class is allergic - one to peanuts and the other just tree nuts. But only if eaten. Lucky Ricky also has contact sensitivity. :(

They have snack time too - and the teachers sent a note saying that snacks with nuts or peanut butter may not be brought to school. The worry is that they will get peanut butter on their hands, touch the same toys, or seats, and Ricky will be exposed, and will have a problem. So far, so good. No problems.

Now he is in kindergarten and is invited to birthday parties. Ricky's doctor said he has to have his epipen with him at all times - at play dates especially - she said - because people will accidentally give him something that has nuts or was made on the same equipment, and he will have a problem. So there you have it.

Ricky is invited to a birthday party tomorrow at Chuck E Cheese. Most of the boys at this age navigate their way around that place by themselves or with another pal. Their parents usually drop them off and come back later. Ricky likes me to play some of the games with him. I don't want to be a hovering mom, so my mom will actually take him the party and stay on the sidelines with his epipen and benadryl in her purse. Then I don't have to teach the hosting parents how to use it, etc. ("....and you just push this and stick the long needle at a 90 degree angle into Ricky's thigh - hard enough so it goes through his jeans...") I feel like I should take a break from being there so the boys don't think Ricky always has to have his mom around. Having Grandma hover is a good switch. This way Ricky is protected and I know he's in good hands.

When Ricky is older he will eventually learn how to use the epipen himself and will have to keep it in his pocket while he's at school. In the meantime, since he's just a kid, an adult has to be around to use it. Ricky hasn't been invited to play dates at all this school year - and I'm wondering if the epipen thing is the reason why. We've been so busy, it's almost better that we've hosted.

Besides the teacher, it's come to my attention from being dumped by Mandy that many people do not fully understand the severity of this allergy. I mean, a good friend of mine told me that I was overprotective and crazy for sending Ricky's epipen with him to a birthday party - and that I better not give the parents the epipen at play dates. I mean, she DUMPED me over this. You can read about here and here. What floored me is that she used to be a teacher. Obviously to me now, a crappy one. I realize now that I did a bad job explaining the details of Ricky's allergy to my mommy friends. When we'd get together, it is usually chaotic, and trying to keep up any kind of conversation is challenging. Talk is usually choppy.

When I was going through secondary infertility, I sought out bloggy moms who were going through the same thing. I got ideas from them, and they supported me too. I now realize that I should really try to find others out there who have kids with peanut/tree nut allergies - and learn how they handle situations at school, sports, and every day. So I'll be looking at groups, blogs, and boards. Just like SIF, I'm sure I'll find some people out there with lots of good ideas. I could use some.

Crazy Fridge, Crazy Me

Last week I woke up at 2am to the sound of what I thought was Mark snow-blowing in our kitchen. It was loud, crazy, and obnoxious. I ran into the kitchen, still asleep but standing, to find Mark wrestling with our refridgerator. Somehow it decided to make a horrible noise, like it was going to blow up, in the middle of the night. Happy the boys didn't wake up. Mark unplugged the darn thing - and sure enough, 2 days later, the fridge died.

So here I sit on my couch, waiting for the delivery men to come with our new fridge - a cheap (but nice and pretty) one to leave in a house that is for sale. I told Mark that we need to move asap because with our luck, the stove, washer, and dryer will all die too - and I really don't want to be spending any more money on this house. I would rather spend it on nice appliances for the other house.

Teddy woke up last night at 3:30 screaming and decided he wanted to watch Sesame Street. Mark had been up the whole time (he hasn't slept in days due to the 2 job offers he's received - they are both great and he doesn't know which one to take!) and he really needed to sleep so in order to get some quiet in the house, I had to give into Teddy and let him watch TV at 3:30am. He pretty much passed out sitting up eating his lunch, so he'll be taking a nice long nap. But boy am I tired!!! Up since 3:30 and no nap in my near future.

We finally found an outfit for Ricky to wear for his Christmas performance at school. I just have to remember to get the pants hemmed in time.

So things have been crazy to say the least. No Christmas photo for our cards taken yet, no presents wrapped, not done with Christmas shopping. There's only about one week left, right? I've been meaning to bake some cherry pies for over a week and never got the chance yet. I plan on baking my Christmas cookies sometime too.

I took Teddy to story time at the library yesterday. They don't read a book - so I don't know why they call it storytime but we just sing songs and finger plays and they play with a bunch of toys. Then we go upstairs to the kids' department and he plays there for a while. He really likes it. It's hard for me to watch him at story time, and not following what the librarian is doing and not really listening. The other kids are following along and participating, and he stands up and runs away from me. It's hard for me to hear the other tots say "mama" or "book" and Teddy says nothing to me and just does caveman language. It really makes me worry that there is something more than just a speech delay. We won't be able to test for anything like that til after he's 3.

I'm going to try to sign him up for Tots Gymnastics this afternoon. They can't do it over the phone so I have to go out in the frigid cold to register! Ugh. Hopefully there are still openings. For Ricky we are considering floor hockey, swimming, or karate - we have to decide soon because everything starts the first week of January. I seriously do not know how people with more than 2 kids do it with all the sports and stuff!!

Anyway, not really sure what the point of this post was. Just babble!

Random Thursday

I took Teddy to the Kohl's Children's Museum this morning and he loved it. My mom bought us a membership so I plan on taking him there once a week to run around if I can. Ricky loves it there and it's really a cool place. I heard lots of kids sneezing and coughing, and I'm dreading the thought of Teddy catching something from our visit (his hospital stay with pneumonia still fresh in my mind), but it can't be helped. He's been going crazy here at home - so bored - same old toys. Tomorrow he has speech therapy and he has his Toddlers in Action class. Both things he loves.

I have to work tonight at the library and I'm hoping it will be a smooth evening. I actually am looking forward to it. It's my time to interact with adults and help people find books and dvds. What could be better.

I am reading Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout - my third attempt. So far, so good. Not sure what my problem was those other times - maybe mommy a.d.d.

Not done Christmas shopping and still not sure if we're hosting Christmas day with my ILs. Our Christmas card photo still hasn't been taken. I'm not worried about it and not stressed at all. Is there something wrong with me?

I have to say that I'm starting to watch "The Talk" almost every day during nap time while I'm on the computer (yeah I should be walking on the treadmill instead but whatever). I used to watch "The View" (I love Whoopie) but it got too serious and they would argue all the time and I could never understand what anyone was saying because they would all talk at the same time. I like "The Talk" - all the ladies seem so nice and crack me up. No fighting. Been a SAHM for nearly 6 years and haven't watched one soap opera!

The Importance of UP!!

Teddy had his speech therapy appointment this morning with Ms. Diane. She got him to build blocks vertically and say, "UP" several times each time he added a block!! You can't imagine how terribly excited we are. Teddy says close to nothing that is discernible besides 'mama" and "dada."

Teddy will be 2 in a month. I worry about him all the time and I will continue to do so until he talks more and shows that he is OK. I blame myself for his silence. When he was 11 months old, Mark went to Missouri with his mother for a funeral and stayed overnight. Teddy was sick and got up a few times in the night and finally I just put him in bed with me. I was exhausted, out of it, and thought he would be comforted by being with me. Barricaded by pillows, my arm and my leg strategically placed to sense each movement.

I will never forget the sound of BOOM...then the piercing cry. He fell off our bed. Onto our hardwood floors. I phoned the doctor in the morning and they said that if he vomits, he has a concussion. The nurse was very nice. I was embarassed, self-loathing at being a stupid mother. She said if he doesn't vomit, he's fine. Well he never vomited. His eyes looked fine, no bumps on his head.

I still wonder if that fall caused him some brain damage that is the root of his speech issues. That or the fact that I was very sick when I was pregnant with him and took lots of meds. I had gestational diabetes and asthma - which led to such a horrible cough that I fractured my ribs - front first - then the back a few months later. I had to take steroids to suppress the cough and tons of Tylenol 3. Or was it all the fertility drugs I took the year before Teddy was conceived. Did all that screw up my eggies? Who knows.

Ms. Diane says he is making good progress and making more sounds. He is actually paying more attention to the books we read together and he sits with me longer than he did in the past. I am really hoping he is OK. Please god. Make him Ok.

Anyways, that's where things are with Teddy on the speech front.

In the meantime, I have a horrible headache today - the first day of December with our first snow. Nothing that seems to stick, but I love watching it blow around in the sky. I plan on cutting out snowflakes with Ricky when he gets home from school.

Not a lick of Christmas shopping accomplished! No decorations put up yet! No clue what our Christmas card photo will be. We might host but we're not sure yet!! I'm actually pretty calm about everything. Am I crazy?

After Turkey Daze

I was crabby for one more day after that last posting then snapped out of it. Thank god! I hate being in a bad mood. Such a waste of time. I missed story time at the library today - just too lazy. Instead I read Teddy 6 books and he played with our toys with our own germs on them. His attention span for books is getting better.

Thanksgiving was good. Since we spent last year's Turkey day with my side, it was Mark's turn. So we stopped at my mom's for about an hour for appetizers. It was also my sister's birthday - poor thing. Than we packed the kids back in the car and headed out for my SIL's house to spend the holiday with my IL's.

I cooked 2 side dishes and baked a cake for my mom to help her out. Then we picked up eggrolls and a yummy dessert to bring to my SIL's. My MIL and SIL are awesome cooks and I tried in the past but just realized it's not worth it (they like what they like are aren't open to try other stuff) so we just bring eggrolls and a dessert. No hurt feelings - less work for me!!

The food was great - the company was great. Our oldest nephew is home from college so it was fun to hear about college life from him. I felt bad for my SIL though - because her MIL invited their entire side to their house except for my SIL and her family - just to be a beeyatch. And they live 5 houses away. And just to be jerks, they ALL came over (my BIL's 2 brothers, spouses, kid, aunt, grandma, dad, etc), except her MIL, unannounced and uninvited for dessert and coffee. My SIL and I hid the expensive dessert we brought when the doorbell rang!! So they crashed our celebration. Not the classiest people.

Mark and I offered to host Christmas (are we crazy???) but it still seems like we won't do it. Mark's grandma has bad legs and is a big lady. She can't do stairs at all. A few guys would have to carry her up the stairs and she may not come to Christmas if we host (we have 7 steps into the house). I would love it if people could decide if she would or wouldn't and then decide if we're doing it or not so I can plan. I'll start whining that I need to know when I turn the calendar to December. The nice part is that we don't have to leave. We don't have to pack all the kids stuff - especially Teddy's blankie, pack n play, etc. And since Ricky is super allergic to dogs, he won't have to deal with the cough, runny nose, and not being able to breathe.

The sad part about hosting parties is that I never seem to relax and enjoy myself. Even our fun adult dress up Halloween parties are always a pain in the ass because someone has to answer the door, fill drinks, watch the food, make sure people are having fun dammit, etc. Or maybe I'm just too much of a spaz to be a good hostess. I don't know.

I don't do Black Friday. I hate crowds. We're not gift exchanging on my side of the family. As my sister says, 'My gift to you is that you don't have to buy a gift for me." but we will probably pick names on Mark's side. "Pick names" meaning that Mark and I will probably get our BIL and Mark's grandma because my MIL and SIL rig it every year that they get each other. I used to get annoyed but now I just don't care. Can you tell I've been with Mark for 14 years?? So we're just buying for the kids on both sides.

We had our last open house for the year yesterday and spent most of the weekend cleaning and moving stuff. All for TWO people!!! Now we aren't sure if we should take the house off the market or keep it on through the holidays. So I'm pretty tired today.

Mrs. Crabby Pants

Not sure why but I'm in a really foul mood today. I should be excited about Thanksgiving tomorrow - spending time with both sides of our family and all the yummy food I'll be scooping into my belly. But no, I'm just plain annoyed. Ever have a day when you're crabby for no good reason - just crabby? This doesn't happen to me often and I try not to let it happen. Today I find it kind of hard.

Had fun with the boys this morning here at home. Teddy had his speech therapy appointment (the therapist comes to our house every week - heavenly not to drive him somewhere) and I spent some time working with Ricky on his math and phonics. When Teddy gets up from his nap we have some errands to run and maybe tonight I'll get to see my sister and BIL and maybe bake a pie or two.

The speech therapy is good - Teddy sat with her for 45 minutes straight and played without losing focus or getting up to look for us. She is trying to teach him sign language ("more", etc.) and he signs here and there but not on a consistent basis. I listen to her play with him and do farm animal noises and car and truck noises and I think - this is what I do too - and it must not be enough - because we have to have someone come to our house and play with him and pay them. Kind of feel like a crappy mom about that!!

Had parent-teacher conferences yesterday for Ricky. He's doing well overall and is above average. Got every single math problem correct this year so far - his teacher says. He's great at phonics and mastered all the letter sounds and can read. He's not as interested in practicing how to write letters and numbers and this is where he may start talking to his neighbor and lose focus.

He will also tattle on other people when he is not involved - she said a lot of them do this. I told him to mind his own business except if a student is getting hurt. This tattling thing is so subjective!! I think it's okay for kids to tattle for other kids. Here is an example - the Big Bully took Ricky's Star Wars lunch bag during snack time and wrote all over it. This was when the bullying was still going on. Ricky was intimidated and didn't want to tell and the girl who sits across from him got up from her seat and told the teacher. Ricky was very grateful.

I have decided to stop being so grumpy. Starting now. I have a great husband and 2 adorable little boys and a family who loves me. Everyone is healthy, nobody is dying. We have a house and are renovating another. Fun family holidays are upon us. Lots to look forward to. So I'm slapping myself with the happy stick right now !!!! (*SLAP, *SLAP, *SLAP!!)

Spilling the Beans on Santa - Not Cool

Last week Ricky came home from school and told me that there was a first grader at recess who told everyone that there is no Santa Claus, no Easter bunny, and no tooth fairy!!!! At Ricky's school the kindergarteners and first graders have the same lunch and recess time.

My mind scrambled to find something good to say, and I was trying to control my face - all the while internally cursing this first grader in my head!!!!

I told Ricky that the boy probably is naughty so he doesn't get any presents from Santa, the Easter bunny, or the tooth fairy. I told him that these 3 (along with God and Jesus - we are Catholic) are all buddies and know what everyone is doing. So the fact that this boy has been going around telling all the kids not to believe is SUPER naughty and that boy probably won't make it on Santa's list this year.

I then told him not to tell this boy or anyone at school what I just told him. Also, not to talk about Santa, the tooth fairy, or the Easter bunny *at all*. I figured that no discussion is better.

The first grader who spilled the beans more than likely has older siblings and found out that way. I always figured Ricky would hear the truth at school at some point - just not soooo early!! I really hope Ricky believed what I told him. He was doubtful and I tried to restore his belief. I am hoping he still believes - that's the magic of being a kid - thinking things are possible. I really want him to really believe as long as possible.

I'm curious to know how other people found out as kids. I found out when I had the chicken pox when I was 5 and had to stay in bed while my family went to midnight mass Christmas Eve. I pretended to sleep but caught my grandma loading up my stocking. I heard all kinds of excuses, but knew better. My husband found out when he was little when his grandma said to him, "You still don't believe in Santa Claus, do you????" hehehhe.

Plastic Bubble Please

I decided to change the look of my blog because...well...I may be getting old but I found the font and layout hard to read. So if I am lazy to read my own blog, who in the world would want to also?? Besides, change is good. Even though it's just a blog, it's exciting - I'm a kid again and I feel like I just rearranged the furniture in my bedroom. woo hoo!

Just when things seemed to be getting better in the house, Mark came down with the stomach flu last night. Coming out of both ends. Lovely. He was supposed to go to the Bulls game tonight with a friend. So he's out of commission - in bed as I type this - passed out with a bucket next to the bed. So I really was not meant to venture out to that Kindergarten moms night out. What a convenient excuse - to myself!

I am a frantic housewife, lysol-ing and wiping every door knob and surface. I suspect he caught this from the hospital a few days ago - the doctors mentioned a stomach bug going around. The last thing I need is for the boys to catch this - especially Teddy who just got out of the hospital a few days ago. He is still coughing and is having loose, yucky diapers - probably from the antibiotics he's taking. I hope he and Mark don't have the same thing.

Poor Ricky. Stuck at home. Thankfully I took him to the library yesterday afternoon and we checked out a bunch of books and dvds. It's pouring outside, so I don't feel so bad about staying in. It's a great day for board games!!

The Only Good Reason a Man Should Lay on Top of Your Toddler

I was just reminded by The Captain's Wife that I haven't updated on my "friend" the cyst that decided to plant itself on my neck. The darn thing is still there. It's been a few months. I've seen 2 doctors who just shrug and tell me that it's fine to have an enlarged lymph node hang out. For years. I requested to be referred to an Ear, Nose, and Throat doctor and the last doctor I saw told me I was "not rational." She pointed to the freckles on my face and said, "Just accept it's there. You accept those black spots on your face, so just accept the lump in your neck. It's not hurting you and it's not cancer. It doesn't feel like it." While it's nice to know you don't think I have the Big C, thanks a lot for making me feel great about my sun damaged complexion lady!!!

So whatever. What I *really* need to do is get that mammogram I've put off!!

Anyways, the last week has been insane. Teddy just spent a few days in the hospital this past weekend and it really sucked. He had a fever (temps of 103+) for 4 days, and had a cough that would be so bad that it would trigger a gag reflex - which would lead to vomiting. If we would give him ibuprofen or acetominophen he would cough and eventually vomit too. Finally by Sunday he had thrown up 3 times in 9 hours and was still burning up.

He wouldn't drink anything and we worried he was dehydrated so we took him to the ER. They did a whooping cough/pertussis test (negative) and gave him a chest x-ray. The doctors on duty didn't hear pneumonia when they listened to him, nor did they see it on the x-ray. It was the radiologist who caught it. Thank god for that.

Meanwhile, before this hospital visit, Teddy had seen his pediatrician twice.

The speech delay really sucked in this instance because many times a doctor (there were many) would ask me things like, "Has he complained to you that his throat hurts?" Well, no, he doesn't talk yet - he's got a speech delay. God I wish he could just TELL me where it hurts or anything like that. Ugh.

Probably the worst thing about the visit was the IV. Teddy hates going to the doctor and hates painless things like the stethescope. He basically does not like anyone outside of family to be touching him at all. It made this visit difficult - the nurse would just enter the room and he would start crying. So you can just imagine how the IV insertion went.

It consisted of a large white sheet that they wrapped him in like a mummy. Then a large man had to hold him down by kind of laying on top of him to keep him still. Teddy was kicking and crying and downright hysterical. I was by Teddy's face and I hated seeing the look on his face of, "Mommy, how can you let these people hurt me????" He's only 22 months and doesn't get it yet, but it still sucks. I was trying to control myself and not be frantic, but at one point I had to ask to no one in particular, "Can he BREATHE under there?" to which the nurse (who was annoyed) said, "We're not here to hurt your child you know." I knew that, but I just wanted to make sure Teddy didn't pass out because this 250 pound man was on top of him. They tried his arms, his foot, and the nurse couldn't get the vein. So she brought in a nurse from the children's hospital who sounded like Marge Simpson - who finally got it after 2 tries. Poor Teddy. I was so grateful they got the vein though. I was amazed because I saw nothing.

Needless to say, they wrapped his hand and arm up like a huge cast so he couldn't remove the IV. He looked like he broke his arm. They even taped his fingers down. Considering he had a fit in the waiting room because he wanted to remove the ID bracelet, I was shocked he got used to this huge arm situation so well.

Ricky stayed with my mom and Mark and I spent the night with Teddy. We traded in the crib for a regular hospital bed so I could sleep next to Teddy. He threw up a few times more but with the IV we were out of the danger zone. They released him the next day. He's on an antibiotic.

It's been a few days and he's slowly getting his appetite back but he's still not the same. I keep wondering where the heck he got this virus that is totally kicking his ass. I've vowed to get the boys their flu shots next week - as well as my own. Being sick is so scary.

On another note, tonight is the Kindergarten Moms night out at a local bar. Am I going? Part of me thinks I should go and mingle but after I think of what happened to me and how the "popular kids" don't want to see me, I don't want to go. I ran into Jane at Jewel the other day (a good friend of Mandy) and she totally didn't want to see or talk to me. I say hi and small talk to everyone -even if they hate me- I cannot be an ass. She walked away from me while I was still talking!!! I don't need any more friends but this is all for Ricky. I figure that I can be friendly with the boys' moms at sports and stuff and that's all that matters. A few moms asked me to go and meet them tonight but I don't think I want to deal with it. Maybe the less people know you, the better. There is more mystery, and they think what they want. When there is nothing left to uncover, it is boring. I don't know.